There is a common misconception that introverts are afraid of people -- that they're shy, timid, fearful. Although certainly there are introverts (as there are people who are not introverts with the same fear) who happen to be afraid of people, they are not afraid of them because they are introverts, but for other reasons! I once ran into this misconception personally when I found out indirectly that I have apparently for a very long time been thought of by at least one person (probably others, too, I imagine) as a "fearful" person who is afraid of people -- for the reason that I would do most anything to avoid getting together socially. But the people I don't want to interact with are not people I am fearful of (nor do I usually dislike them); they are people with whom I have very little in common...or at least nothing that needs to be shared or discussed in a face-to-face social situation -- I don't mind at all talking in person to clerks in stores or librarians in a library or to any other people in situations where there is information that needs to be shared (these are not what I call "social" situations).
Introverts, when they communicate with people they are not around all the time, prefer to do some research, think ahead, and plan out what they're going to say and what they hope to achieve by means of the meeting. Furthermore, they prefer if possible to do carry out this "meeting" in writing, which they can take some time with to work out the best way to put things to accomplish what they need to accomplish, as well as take their time to let what others say sink in, and to note what they don't want to forget.
Introverts think better (they think differently than do non-introverts) and are more in command of themselves and their responses when they're by themselves and have time (and mental space) to prepare well. They can do their very best when alone. If an introvert were a "fish" then time spent alone would be his or her "water."
Extroverts, on the other hand, do their kind of thinking while talking aloud to or with someone; furthermore, they don't feel the time pressure imposed by a face-to-face situation that introverts feel strongly and are very much distracted by. If an extrovert were a "fish" then time spent with others would be his or her "water."
Besides not having the time (and mental space) to consider what I'm going to say and even what I'm going to do while "visiting" socially, another powerful reason I dislike "social only" gatherings of people (be it only two people or any number of them) where extemporaneous speech about the topic of the second is expected is that I believe there is no useful purpose served by most of these gatherings. A lot of them are devoted to gossip and small talk or else to discussion of things everyone already knows, none of which I'm the least bit interested in. And there are always things I would much rather be doing. I am very sensitive to time and want to use it well. I do not think that sitting or standing around awkwardly talking about nothing of importance as the minutes and hours fly by is a good use of time and in fact to me it is an appallingly awful waste of time. None of this has anything to do with being afraid of people.
I know what fear is like as I have a couple of actual phobias (needles, heights). I know that I have no fear of people. If I were afraid of people, I wouldn't want to be in a place where there were a lot of them. I wouldn't even want to go into a grocery store or a library or a post office (especially when there are long lines), but I don't mind being in these situations at all. Also, it doesn't bother me at all to be a member of an audience...even a very large audience, as long as the event I'm there for is of interest to me. The truth is that I don't mind being around people when I'm not required to socialize, and in fact I could be in a crowd of thousands and I would be fine under circumstances in which I was free to leave at any time if I wanted to, and where I wasn't pointed out and asked unexpected questions of (say for TV), and as long as I didn't have to play a social role more than simple politeness requires, or give a speech that I couldn't read from the page...yet even if I was expected to do any of these things I've just mentioned my wish to be away from there as soon as possible would not be inspired by fear of people. It would be more of a "fish out of water - can't be myself in these circumstances and I'm wasting time" type of motivation.
To me socializing without a useful purpose -- particularly a purpose in which I myself can be of good use (and I cannot be of good use when "out of water") -- is unnecessary and depressing. This is why I prefer spend most of my time alone, or with another introvert I'm compatible with and share interests with and work together with regularly. This desire to be alone has nothing to do with fear.
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